Delete comment from: Just in CASE
Thank you to Anonymous, Julie, Andrea and Angel for your comments. It's good to remember that all children and parents are different. This is one of the reasons I stress in the review that the Bible is less clear about the methods we use for parenting than it is with what should be our intent. My great regret with Tripp's book is that he privileges physical punishment over all other methods. I do see a place for physical punishment, but if this were regular I'd encourage parents to reconsider their parenting strategies. I would never use physical punishment to try to harm the child. A slap on the legs was as far as it went in our house (and rarely).
Angel asks a number of questions to which I will respond. You suggest that 'rod' in the Bible is often used in terms of striking, but it is also used to mean other things. Even when it is used to mean 'striking' context is important to understand just what that means. Your example of Is 14:29 being used in the sense of striking is interesting. The word 'rod' is used to urge the people of Philistia not to gloat. The rod most likely in this passage refers to the Davidic dynasty, which Ahaz had reduced to a puppet status under Assyria. It might also refer to the Assyrian Empire itself. I don't think you'd want to build a method for parenting based on this as a proof text, except in reminding children that they shouldn't gloat, God hates arrogance (there are better verses for this), judgement (again there are better verses) etc.
The examples from Proverbs might be more helpful for parenting methodology. Proverbs 23:13-14 ("Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from death") certainly suggests that physical punishment has a place (which I've acknowledged) and, it rightly suggests that it should be focused on the salvation of our children.
Proverbs 29:15 also speaks of physical punishment, but the context here would suggest that perhaps it would be more helpful and relevant when thinking of rebellious youth in a society that is clearly out of control. It speaks of punishment in the wider context of social instability and human rebellion. Some might even use this verse to try to justify bringing back the cane to punish publicly rebellious university students taking part in public protest (I'm NOT arguing for this of course!). This would be more justified than using it argue for using an adult hand or spoon on the bottom of a baby crying for its nappy to be changed.
My point with Tripp is basic. He oversteps the reach of Scripture to give prominence to physical punishment from an early age above all other methods. His view that "Biblically, the method is as important as the objectives" is not justifiable. Ensuring our children grow up to know and love the Lord is what is clearly dictated by Scripture, the methods that are to be used are not.
Thanks for your comments.
Nov 14, 2011, 8:40:41 PM
Posted to Shepherding a Child's Heart: Wise advice and one key error
