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Friday, November 10, 2006

Say Goodnight.

I've just spent the past week having a major debate.
But let me first say the Feminem haters need to pull your shit together. Fem was great while I was gone and I am disappointed that so many of my readers were so mean.
In any case, I've had enough. I loved blogging, it was fun, but it's time for me to say b'bye. I won't remove the page, so people with abandonment issues can come back and visit, but this shall be my last post.
The blog grew quickly and I was so excited, but for what?
I have a real career and a real life and I am tired of doing this. I am tired of hating on people. I am tired of hating.
Although I never had the opportunity of meeting Lil' Kim through this blog, maybe I will meet her now that I am freeing up some of my life.
Most of my close friends aren't even aware of this decision, but I am positive that it's time. Should I ever have the opportunity to have ample free time, I will return. However, I don't see that in my near future.
I am happy that I made so many people laugh because of this page. I love being the center of attention and this was a great way to exercise that.
I wish everyone the very best and I can only hope that my faithful readers will wish me the same.
Peace, love, and masturbation,
N-fag

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Who the hell is Katt Williams...

Image Williams was arrested when they found a hand gun in his suitcase at the airport.
Are you fucking retarded.... I can't even bring my monistat-7 and you're toting a gun?
I suppose if no one knew or cared who I was either, I'd plant a gun too....
Bad publicity is STILL publicity.
Color me surprised kids.

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Hi, My name is Lindsay L

So if they hand out poker chips at AA meetings, what do they hand out at Gambler's Anonymous meetings?........
Dime bags?
Just wish this chip was for her:)

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Pre-nup Payout...

Image 'Bout Time... These two both need to go away- NOW!

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Ellen...

ImageUpon her Emmy nomination for her small role in the TV movie "Mrs. Harris," Ellen Burstyn said "I thought it was fabulous, My next ambition is to get nominated for seven seconds, and, ultimately, I want to be nominated for a picture in which I don't even appear."
What a fuckin' ingrateful bitch.... I'm so over celebs and their award-show-drama.

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Jewish Stevie Nicks....

Image On her latest stop on her "Annual Farewell Concert Tour," no one showed up....
She still sang- They just put a big mirror in front of her.....

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We're Cuntry!

Image So she looks good again, big fucking deal...
New Hair, New Dress, but ya still can't do anything about those "Fetal Alcohol Syndrome" eyes hon. Thanks Mom!

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People, are you blind?

Image P.S. I thought he came out like 3 years ago.

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Jenny....

Image Ok, not so into him, but Jenny McCarthy is gorgeous, funny and REAL.... props girl!
I'd definitely fuck her:)

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eeeww...

Image I guess it was "Bring an awtistic girl to the game" night..... whats up with that?
Ditch the bitch and make the switch Tobes!

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And the award for biggest bitch......

Image So Faith shows her true colors, in an ego-inflated-rage-filled-outburst that signals the down fall of award shows as we know them....
If I could have a hate prom Faith would be the queen and Kanye would be the king!

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Work......

Image Luv me some Carrie Underwood! AMAZING...... She completely deserved "Female Vocalist of the Year," I'm listening to her album right now.....
Fuck You Faith!

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Um, Mr. President.....

Image President bush seen here, exercising his constituional right to vote.
Unfortunately, when Bush couldn't find his party candidates listed, the first lady interrupted by saying "um, Honey, thats a Dr. Pepper vending machine, just follow the sign with the big red arrow..... good boy!"

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Sunday, November 05, 2006

Gay of the Day!

Image I love Bruce Vilanch!

Scar Jo......

Image Why is this female famous?

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Pull my finger....

Image I made a stinky...... it was good.

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This week on Judge Oprah...

Image I love me some Oprah....
I mean, I watched all 6 dvd's of that 20 year anniversary box set,
but when did she get appointed God.
"Tell them, Tell them how you killed your baby!"
"Tell them now, What's my name, bitch?"

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Hollywood walk of undeserved fame.....

ImageRyan Seacrest FINALLY gets a star.
Geezus, what does a person have to do to get some recognition these days, god.
Times are hard, so the only celeb who they could afford to present the star was
Mr. Burns from the Simpson's

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Brilliant.....

Image This is what Halloween is all about....Clever, Timely & self explanatory...
Bill Maher for President!


Twilight Zone...

Image Dude, hit that shit while it lasts,
'cause pretty soon you're gonna wake up from that dream!
(Or the roofies are gonna wear off, whichever comes first)

Just bad PR decision making....

Image My Pussy is so warm and fuzzy..... it tickles.. he he he!
Oh, and isn't this kitty cat pretty too!

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Re-hab,Schmee- Hab...

Image The career that coke built...

Character research.....

Lohan spotted while rehearsing for her role in the upcoming blockbuster "Helen Keller: Redux"

Don't touch my "faggot".....

Image God, if I were making a $100,000.00 a week,
I'd stand where they tell me to & shut the fuck up!

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Feminem

Image Yo, it's Feminem here, filling in for my girl F-A-G..... thanks for letting sit in for the week. Still figuring out this whole Blogging community-
thanks for your patience. Enjoy kids....

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Gay of the Day

Image Clay- you better frost that hair boy...

Shut the fuck up....

Image When Kanye's video was snubbed at the MTV Europe awards, he stormed the stage complaining that his video "cost a million dollars, had Pamela Anderson in it and he was jumping across canyons!" Kanye officially wins my award for most sore-ass loser....
guess who won't be getting invited to my place for Pictionary?

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I am from planet Bjork...

Image Why do I have the strange feeling that neither of those two
were involved in the creation of that child?

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Tori Swelling....

Image Girl, I told you nobody likes your Barbra Streisand impression....

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Madonna & Child

Image What else can I say? Thank god those kids are rich 'cause DAMN they're fugly!
Lourdes, you better get real dextrous wit' dem tweezers, yer' gonna need em.

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What the?

Image Did Hugh Jackman goes as Courtney Cox for Halloween,
or maybe he was going for Keith Partidge?
Dude, you've got to be kidding with that hair...

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Jenna Jameson- The Girl I'd fuck...

Image Now, I try not to stray from the gay porn vernacular, but this straight porn mogulette does it for me.... If you saw her early work you'll know she's had some work done. Shoot, she's so hot I'd even blow her plastic surgeon.....
Work!

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God Bless The USA

Image Fierce Bitches! These girls are what this country is all about!
Tell it like it is girls....
Love ya, mean it!

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Daniel Radcliffe

Image This one makes Clay Aiken look like a Longshoreman.

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Sara's Evan's "Other Woman"

Image First of all, no one even knew who Sarah Evans was until this "Dancing with the Stars" debacle. And by stars, I mean whoever's agent was able to get through on the not-so-hot-line! P.S. kids, I used to know Alison when we were 12 years old in talent competitions.... Very talented girl. Now she's very talented and skinny?

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Lohan Clan

Image
Proof that nepostism is alive and well! Lindsay's younger & apparently "Chromosomally Challenged" sister has recorded a christmas album. Thank god for re-gifting.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

N-Fag Is Going On Vay-Cay! Enjoy Feminem While I Am Gone!

Image So, I'll be away from Friday until next Friday and I pass the blogging buck to my pal Feminem. Feminem will be posting in my absence for the next week!
While I am finding Jesus, please enjoy Feminem's witty humor - and be nice!

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Is That Meth Stuck In Lindsay Lohan's Nose...

Image Or is it just shadows?

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Britney Is Totally Back On The Fig.

Image Now that she is not with child, she is totally using coke again. I know, I know, it's Halloween, but c'mon weight loss that fast, bitch please.

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Again, Paris Hilton Wears her Normal Clothing Out For Halloween

Image Fuck this bitch.
So I was talking to my niece and her friends accused me of being bitter... How dare they?!? Just kidding, but c'mon, I just tell it like it is. I don't actually think of what I write on this blog as bitter, but more like the things that people think, but are afraid to say...
Jenny, I love you and I love that your friends visit this blog....

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Rumor Mill: Brian Austin Green Married This Chick.

Image Which is great, I suppose, but I thought he was a big ole nelly bottom...

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The Dr. Laura Doll.

Image The fact that this is real is what scares me most. But doesn't the doll look like Carolyn from The Apprentice more than Dr. Laura?

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Kate Bosworth AKA Bones Bosworth.

Image Bitch, get some help and don't pull a Nicole 2 day rehab stint. Get some real help. I'll personally feed you shakes and burgers...

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Gay of the Day!

Image Neil Patrick Harris.
Well, he is fighting off those gay rumors.
I'd totally fuck Doogie Howser, MD.

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Pumpkin Kisses A Tranny Named New York.

Image New York is totally getting a hard on right here.
Why, I ask, why???

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Tyra Banks Is Even UGLIER As A Man!

Image This bitch, photographed with Chingy, looks like she would cut a ho to get some 'dro.

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Lindsay Lohan: The Crystal Meth Years.

Image Is this bitch doing the walk of shame. that's what it looks like. I remember one Halloween in Boston, I was like 19 and I was doing the walk of shame (I didn't have money for the T, which I later remembered is free outbound above ground on Comm Ave) in a costume from somewhere in The Fenway to Glenville Ave in Allston. I made it halfway home, before remembering that part of my costume included toilet paper hanging out of my ass.
Derr. And people ask me why I don't drink or do drugs anymore...

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Oh My Gaw!

Image Is this for Halloween, Jessica? I am frightened and horrified. Okay, I know celebs have the right to go out in public without makeup. Yes, the rights they have, but they shouldn't. Never. Never ever.

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Sometimes, Glasses Can't Even Help.

Image The fact that this is Courtney Love frightens me more than the glasses though. Sobriety is supposed to make people look better...

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Kevin Federline Ticket Sales Blow Chunks.

Image But two of my pals are going to see him when he comes to NYC and I am kind of jealous, I mean I haven't been to a comedy show in years...

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Gay of the Day!

Image Michael Musto.
I don't know either.

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Not A Cute Look For Justin Timberlake.

Image But we all know it's just that the camera snapped at the wrong moment, my man is delish!

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Fuck This Shit!

Image Ashlee Simpson stole my man, Pete Wentz. Are they an item?
Am I that removed from the world?

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Kate Bosworth Pulls A Nicole Richie.

Image Photo opping with a cart full of groceries, just when the media is attacking her about her anorexia.
Bitch, please.

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Becky Buckwild To Ebay The Infamous Shoe!

Image How crazy is this shit? I so want the shoe. I wish she clocked that bitch/tranny New York in the head though. I was so over La La yelling at her, I wished she hit that bitch too! Damn.

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Dave Navarro Is Sexy.

Image I just want to spank that ass. All day, all night. He looks so good!

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