Ask Richard: How do you keep joy alive during difficult times?

How do you keep joy alive during difficult times? Such a wonderful question, thanks for sharing, Deborah Henry. 

If there’s anything I’ve learnt this year, it’s that joy and grief can exist all at once, and side by side. Since losing Joan, I’ve tried not only to think about what I’ve lost, but about everything we had. Fifty years of love, laughter, family, adventures and quiet cups of tea. She was the shining star of our family. Keeping her legacy alive means remembering the happy times, telling the stories, and trying to carry forward the kindness, wisdom, and joy she brought into the world. You’ve got to hold onto the joy.

This week, Virgin Atlantic unveiled the flying icon on their newest plane in her honour. It’s called Viva Forever, and it’s such a beautiful tribute. It fills me with joy to think of her flying through the skies for many years to come. 

Throughout my life, I’ve learned that when things feel heavy, it’s doing the small things that make you feel alive. You’ve got to keep up a routine that makes you feel like yourself. Not a relentless grind, but a routine that brings you joy. During some of the toughest periods I’ve faced in business (and in life), I've kept my routine going as best as I could: hiking, tennis, cycling, eating well, spending time with the family, catching sunsets, and early nights. Movement clears my head. It keeps me focused on the horizon and reminds me that however difficult today feels, tomorrow can look different. When you’re going through hell or high water, you’ve just got to keep moving. 

And then there is family (whatever family means to you). Time with loved ones has a wonderful way of shrinking problems back to their proper size. Being present with my family always brings me back to what really matters: loving and being loved. There is nothing more important than this.

Being an entrepreneur and chartering unknown territories comes with its fair share of sharp failures, sleepless nights, business battles, and mistakes played out in public. Throughout it all, I’ve learnt one thing: this too shall pass. And so, I’ve always tried to take the work seriously, but not myself too seriously. My mum even taught us to laugh when we were in pain. Not because difficult things are funny, but because a little humour can let some light back in. 

Joy, for me, is not pretending everything is fine. It is being relentlessly dedicated to optimism, and to a routine that keeps you there.